The Sad Truth Of Most TV And Movie Universes

I binge watched Season 6 of Game Of Thrones this weekend, and while doing so I was reminded of those quizzes that flood Facebook where they ask you what GOT character you would be.  And countless people take these quizzes or else they wouldn’t appear on your Facebook and countless people come to the same conclusion.  They like to believe that they would be a Tyrion Lannister, Daenerys Targaryen, or Jon Snow when in reality, if they were plucked from our world into theirs, they would be nameless farmer #347763, destined to be slaughtered by rogue Wildlings, roving gangs, or one of the many conqueror families that are bound to happen upon their little hamlet.  I’m not saying this to be insulting, because it would be the same for me and just about everyone else.

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Dialogue Gripes In Movies And TV

Today’s post is a mix of several things; I recently got into consistently watching movies, I just finished 11.22.63(both the Stephen King book and Hulu miniseries) and I just started The Sun Also Rises by Hemingway.  Maybe it’s Hemingway’s trademark of leaving things out, A Theory of Omission, as suggested by a Hemingway scholar I scoffed at when I was young and edgy, or maybe I expect better from my visual media, because I’ll notice dialogue tropes that infuriate me.  I’m only going to list a couple, but if anyone has other gripes be sure to comment them.

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Being Pretentious And How Not To Be

I saw a tweet the other day.  I can’t recall the exact verbiage of the post but it went along the lines of “Barnes & Noble has Infinite Jest out on their stands because someone wants to prove they actually read it.”  I guess by writing this I feel like I’m trying to prove something.  I have read it.  I thought it was excellent and probably one of the most unique books I have read.  It’s clunky at first but it either smooths itself out or you become used to it by page 250, give or take.  I want to read it with a group or a least another person, so I’m trying to convince my girlfriend to read it with me this summer.

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The Wrong Generation

Based on my demographics, most reading this are in probably in the 18-30 age range, and based on my casual browsing of Facebook, most of you wish you did not exist in 2016.  What do I mean?  I see memes pop up all the time with a picture of a picturesque representation of the 30s, 50s or 60s, always followed by the caption I wish I lived here or I was born in the wrong generation!  Why?  Let’s talk it out.

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Four Social Media Sites(And Their Narcissistic Archetypes)

Based on my brief understanding of demographics, the odds are that most of you reading this are selfish, narcissistic millennials.  Millennials being the most offensive term of the bunch if TV news outlets and old people are to be believed.  I don’t think we are more self-centered than the last generation.  I simply believe that we have more access to reach the world than ever before, and if that hadn’t happened with this particular group of young people, the narcissistic claim would have stuck to any previous or future generation.  With that being said, there are things I see on social media that would make me retract that claim.

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A Teen Vampire Book/Show/Movie (From The POV Of An Average Person)

Hey it’s me, Jan.  I’m a typical high school student at Nondescript High School.  I refer to cool things as ‘sweet’ or ‘swag’.  I live in the small town of Smalltown; population 8000, 6000 of which go to Nondescript High with me.  Lately, some weird things have been going on.  Kids are being found dead with their hearts missing.  Others are showing up to school with visible bite marks but seem oblivious to it.  I have no evidence, but these events seem to correlate when all the hot people started showing up to school.

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On Pop Stars

Go up to ten people and ask them what they think of Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, Miley Cyrus, or any relevant uber famous person in pop culture.  I would bet that most of these people will say something like “ugh, they’re terrible people”, “how are they famous?” “They’re all so stupid” and a myriad of complaints, some so vile I don’t think I could type them.

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Thoughts on Jurassic World

WARNING: ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO YEARN TO BE SPOILER FREE

What else would I possibly be writing about this week?  I have been hyped for Jurassic World since the first trailer was released back in November.  I preordered my tickets weeks in advance.  I called off work the day of the midnight release so I wouldn’t have to rush from work right to the movies.  I’ve been waiting for a sequel since the goddamn Spinosaurus massacred the T-Rex back in 2001.  However, in recent months, I became worried.  The trailers were showing too much and the dialogue seemed too campy.  So, in preparation for the movie, I casted my nostalgia aside to see how I really felt about the new installment of the JP franchise.

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The Four People You Meet In A Group Text

Trigger Warning: Group texts imply a large group of friends. For that, I apologize in advance to anyone who is triggered by large groups of friends.

If you’re reading this right now, there is a very good chance you have started or been a part of a group text.  Group texts are great.  They can be used to organize plans, keeping up with family, or they could be used for general conversation if you like talking to a lot of people.  Sometimes, a group text reveals certain roles within your group of friends.  Here are the four people you meet in a group text. Continue reading