In my younger years, when I talked to less people and entertained myself by walking around my town, I used to wonder if I ever came up in conversations I would never hear with people I didn’t associate with. This was not too long before literally everyone had a smartphone. In the years following I have a social media presence. I probably post on social media a few times a week, whether by me actually posting or sharing something, between Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and this blog. Because of this, I imagine it’s something of an infinite-monkeys-with-infinite-typewriters scenario, and there is a more than likely chance that something I have posted has been screencapped by someone, and they have sent it to their friends. Maybe they liked what I said, or maybe they think I’m naïve. Maybe they like me or maybe they don’t, and everything I add to the Socialsphere adds to their derision. I think most people, whether they know it or not, exist as a screenshot on someone’s phone, as a brief topic in someone’s messages. And maybe it is flattering to you or maybe it isn’t, and there’s something terrifying about that.
Based on my brief understanding of demographics, the odds are that most of you reading this are selfish, narcissistic millennials. Millennials being the most offensive term of the bunch if TV news outlets and old people are to be believed. I don’t think we are more self-centered than the last generation. I simply believe that we have more access to reach the world than ever before, and if that hadn’t happened with this particular group of young people, the narcissistic claim would have stuck to any previous or future generation. With that being said, there are things I see on social media that would make me retract that claim.
Dan and Jan. Senior Year of High School(2009) I like to think I grew into my ears
It’s 8th grade. I am a scrawny 13 year old with an American Eagle polo and Hollister jeans that are falling down to my ankles, not because I thought sagging pants were cool but I thought belts were specifically uncool. She’s the prettiest girl I’ve ever met, probably also wearing American Eagle clothing, with “fun” colored braces and wide-eyed stare that made it seem that she was always genuinely excited to see you. I was enamored so I decided I was going to ask her out at the end of the year, so when I was rejected she, I, and everyone in our separate circles would have a whole summer to forget. Now, when I say ask, I don’t mean actually ask. That would be embarrassing, so instead I wrote it down, elementary school style. My palms sweat as I write this. I think you can guess how that turned out. We started dating! Nine years later!
Some years ago, for some reason, some guy or girl was staring at their late 2000s Facebook account. They were going through their wall and their simplistic newsfeed, posting statuses like is going out or is Mondays am I right? Or is oh crap (an actual Facebook status of mine from 2008). This person looked at their profile picture, a picture they took with their 1.6 MP camera that looked good at the time but looking at them now would you make you think that everyone in the late 2000s were melting, the same way we picture the 50s as black and white. This person needed a profile pic and fast, so they went into their saved photos folder and pulled out a random jpeg of a Pokemon. It caught on and now, every December, a dedicated group changes their profile pics for Pokemon Profile Pic December. I don’t care about this at all, but I began to wonder what these people would change their profile pics to if there was a profile pic celebration every month of the year.
Sharing something on Facebook gives the average newsfeed scroller insight into the person that you are. Let’s see what some of these shares could mean.
Facebook sucks or, rather, people suck. Everybody has that person that toes the line between entertaining and incessant, aggravating and amusing. If you don’t have one of these people, go through your blocked friends and unblock them. Their contempt and naiveté will override how annoying they really are. Here are the six annoying people you meet on Facebook.