To quote Papa Gatsby out of context,

“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one,” … “just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

Over the weekend, I was complaining about work as I always do.  I went into detail of the people I work with.  I got to the one person (who shall remain nameless) and was asked the question “Does he play sports?”  I answered the question with “No, he doesn’t look like the type…”  I proceeded to leave the room we were in, kicking and scolding myself.

If you don’t know me, let me give you a brief description of myself.  I am about 5’10”, roughly 155 lbs so I’m average height but appear a bit lanky.  I have brown (some would argue strawberry blond) hair and I wear glasses.  Now I should probably explain why I seem to be overreacting to a misworded sentence I said once.

No one believes I can play sports.

Okay, admittedly that is hyperbole but to an extent it is true.  I’ve had numerous people come up to me and straight up say “Wow.  I didn’t think you could do anything.”  I’m no Olympic athlete but I do my best to encompass myself in athletics year round.  In my summers, I play competitive Wiffle Ball.  On summer evenings, I play Ultimate (also called Ultimate Frisbee).  During the school year, I took Squash classes and made it a point to play at least weekly.  This past December, I played in my friend’s third annual football bowl (winning 80-0).

This happened in the vein of intelligence as well.  I distinctly recall shocking a camp counselor because I won a game of Scrabble when I was 17.  I will admit I am not really smart.  There is a great quantity of things I do not know and will probably never know.  Ancora Imparo.  However, I like to think that I am smart enough for it to not be a shock to people around me.  I make it sound like I am a Rainman/Forrest Gump hybrid.

To get to my (loose) point, how could I generalize a person when I have felt generalized myself?  The “guilty until proven innocent” way simply doesn’t work and is perpetuated in minor instances such as this all the way to the global scale.  I could probably go on Facebook right now and find a status from someone saying “Woman, make me a sandwich.”  On the other hand, I can also find a status saying “All men are pigs.”  I could go down to Wal-Mart and watch a white couple turn their noses at the black people shopping there.  Conversely, I could probably find a black family there chastising an obese woman on an electric cart. This trickledown effect continues until everyone hates everyone else.  It doesn’t have to be this way.  Men don’t suck, Women don’t suck, White people don’t suck, Black people don’t suck, Fat people, Hispanics, Gays, etc.  People suck and we all deserve the chance to be treated as if we don’t.

A Hypothetical on Alien Invasions

Allow me to preface this by stating that I do not sleep with a tinfoil hat on.

I had this dream one night about five years ago.  In this dream I was walking down a street in my neighborhood.  Everything looked as it would if I was awake.  Meanwhile, outside of my subconscious, a powerful thunderstorm was raging through.  Realizing this, I guess my brain decided it wanted to process the thunder.  I got to the corner of a street and I hear this massive explosion like a dynamite factory went up in flames.  I look up to see tons of flying saucers shooting and obliterating everything in sight.  I start running but dream sprinting is always pathetic so instead of Usain Bolting it I was forced to chug along while everyone and everything around me was vaporized. Sigmund Freud says that dreams are used to fulfill wishes.  That dream stuck with me but not because of the juxtaposition of thunder.  It showed me how a realistic alien invasion would occur.

If sci-fi movies have taught me anything, it’s that extraterrestrial beings are mostly bad things that represent some kind of realistic “other” that I’m supposed to be afraid of like Communists, Terrorists, etc.  Movies tend to show mysterious objects coming toward Earth and landing here before attacking (Battle Los Angeles, Independence Day, and War of The Worlds among countless others).  In real life, people speak of mysterious objects in the sky that disappear in between blinks.  They speak of dancing lights and weird orbs.  We see paintings and markings from hundreds, even thousands, of years ago depicting weird saucers and inventions millennia ahead of their time. They ask why aliens need to probe and mutilate cows.  They ask why aliens need to come into their bedroom and kidnap them.  The short answer to this is that they haven’t done any of the things mentioned above.  The longer answer is that they haven’t done any of those things because they wouldn’t need to.

People believe that extraterrestrial beings have been watching us for years.  We also believe that their technology is light-years ahead of anything we have now.  If we put these (hypothetical) facts together then they should be able to watch us without us knowing.  Imagine some twenty-tentacled dude with 500 eyes.  Now imagine thousands of them looking at these hologram surveillance devices on their home planet, taking meticulous notes and studying.  They’d probably have hundreds of years of data on humans compiled at this point.  All it would take is some superior tentacled creature to give the order.  Whether they harnessed faster-than-light travel or wormholes would be irrelevant because their ships would still move insanely fast.  Sometimes scientists can barely see near-Earth asteroids too late.  Would they be able to see a fleet of warships?  These ships would be precise.  They could barrel down on every major capital, city, port, etc. And lay waste to it before anyone could look up to sky and scream.  It would be Shock and Awe to the nth degree.

It seems hard to believe that something that catastrophic could sneak up on us like that.  It shouldn’t.  We’ve seen or read first-hand accounts of sneak attacks in modern history and it’s still argued that people knew about it beforehand.  We can’t keep up with the happenings on our own planet, let alone a solar system, let alone a universe.  An alien invasion wouldn’t chug along to us like the way I ran in my dream.  It would be like the lightning outside my dream.

The Intro

Hello, friends and Mom.  Since this is my first blog post I don’t expect the masses to be clamoring to my site.  I started this blog in an attempt to get a true article writer’s voice down.  The problem is that I am unsure what to write about.  I thought about writing about music but every article would dilute into “5 Reasons Why Death Grips Is The Best Band Going No Matter How Much My Friends Hate Them.”  I thought about a movie blog but that would require me to watch movies.  Therefore, this blog will have a real loose foundation until I have a semblance of tone.  Stay tuned!